Friday, August 12, 2016
Day 201- Writing Self Forgiveness to 'Feel' better as Self Limitation
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to assume what I have envisioned for myself in my mind is accurate.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be manipulated by false uninformed information.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to try to create myself as a mental idea, instead of walking myself out the way I've already proven in self forgiveness and correction.
I don't have the time or luxury of exploring things as much as I do in self forgiveness, when I could be sticking with the formula that I know works.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to try to create myself outside of walking out my abuse through self forgiveness.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to try to create myself and realize nyskef in certain ways as certain ideas I come up with to stop my pain and suffering.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not stick with the way I know how to walk myself out of my separation.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to be more special in being able to be creative and do more then just the time and devotion to keep writing self forgiveness and applying myself in real time.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to settle for loose ideas and concepts to apply in self forgiveness apposed to more legitimate practical self forgiveness as I realize I could better optimize and accomplish more by doing what I realize is more relevant and important to walk out.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to try to create something through self forgiveness instead of just creating myself through self forgiveness.
So focusing on things that I know I can accomplish, and know how to accomplish in self forgiveness, apposed to trying to do special things that produce special feelings through self forgiveness.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to let self forgiveness be about feeling a certain way apposed to stopping dependency on energetic feelings.
So stopping the need to feel good at work, apposed to stopping the things that prevent me from feeling good at work.
Interesting, and makes sense.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to make my short term goals all about feeling better as stopping the things that make me feel 'bad'.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to settle for feeling better in my life when I know I'm struggling and suffering as well as other people.
That's been a big starting point for doing self forgiveness for me, to stop feeling bad, and thusly feel better, I commit myself to not plateuo or settle for feeling better when I have much work to do.
Like how yesterday I realize I was settling for reducing anxiety at work apposed to stopping it completely.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not push myself harder by making my self forgiveness ironically all about feelings as stopping my mind to feel better.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create weak surface level goals for myself in self forgiveness out of fear of not being able to feel ok and comfortable in my life.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize I can take things further then surface level feelings.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not do the best I can by taking things beyond surface level feelings because all I care about is how i feel.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize how I feel as energy has been learnt and experienced as my mind through a thick lens and has no legit basis in reality.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to desire to live out an illusion for the rest of my life as long as I feel comfortable, as I realize I've never felt truly comfortable to my best capacity ever in my entire life, I've always lived with fear and discomfort.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to settle for living a complete lie when it's not right to live that way.
When and as I see myself wanting to live the lie of energetic feelings, I stop, I breathe, I realize I'm living a lie, and it's not right to sit back and let that continue, thusly, I commit myself to stop living the lie of feelings, as I realize in this moment to never forget it's a lie and is not best for life.
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