Day 307- Dig

Investigate desteni.Org

I see some things coming through and then, I get tenative.

I'm not going to let myself bully myself, like let's just back off and return to this point later see how it develops..

I don't trust that, I don't trust that in this moment and in this moment I'm being deleberate.

When I see I'm afraid I don't like it when I tell myself to just ride it out, that I don't allow myself to just face that fear right there, breathe, realize it, live that word release I've tried to open up for myself for theses sort of situations, why let this vauge wordless fear have it's way with me when I have a word, release, relese it.

Dig in, don't let things grow beneath the surface dig in and get to the bottom of what's going on.

I don't need to sit here being punished, why am I punishing myself?

I'm afriad just because of everything?

That doesn't mean anything, dig in, why in this moment do I have to be afraid?

Why am I victimizing myself?

Why can't I stop myself?

I'm doing it to myself I'm puniahing myself I'm happy to make myself suffer, thus, I commit myself to when I see myself just afriad without words without any clear reason to dig in, open up why is it I'm sitting here afraid?

I commit myself to always be digging into myself, to always in each breathe dig into everything that comes up, to get to the bottom, to get to the truth.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hide things from myself beneath the surface.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge myself when I have a thought or when I react where then I cannot dig deeper I've already shut myself down.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to prented like everything is OK with me, where, I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe everything is OK because it seems fine on the surface when I can tell things aren't OK.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be afraid to dig to see what's going on.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hide in the holes I've dug instead of digging deeper getting to the core.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to limit myself to the surface where I have a bunch of mental stuff going on where I'm trying to stop it all but how can I stop anything when all I'm aware of is what's on the surface.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to sit here in undefined fear when I can live the word dig, I know how to dig in to get to the bottom of something to face it no matter how strange or how bizzare or unexpected it is.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear how bizzare my fear that I'm having seems to be.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear what I'm seeing about my fear in this moment where that can't be right that makes no sense.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that when you really dig into something you go past the surface and find things you didn't realize was there consciencely.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to react with surprise in opening up my fear in this moment where I don't understand, how can this point be what's making me afraid?

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge my fears where this is why I don't want to share them because I don't want to be ridiculed.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear opening up even more stuff that's like too much in digging in.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear digging in beause sometimes you open up a can of worms and there's all kinds of stuff flying out you didn't exspect.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear what I'm seeing in digging into this fear in this moment.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear the power of the word dig where now that I've undug what was possessing me, I can't un see it.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear within thinking woah I can't handle this everything I just dropped on myself I just unearthed too much, buy now, after giving it a minute, it's starting to settle in.

When and as I see myself fearing what I'll uncover when I dig into a possession of energy, I stop, I breathe, I realize as how scary it seems on the surface once I dig in and get the information I need, I know I can piece it together, thus, I commit myself to when I see myself possessed with an energetic experience to practice every now and then digging in, even just in my mind open up what's goin on give it a word give it away to open up so I can know what's happening.

I Redefine dig as to uncover what is burrows underneath, as to uncover what is supressed.

...

Time to dig in more.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear I can't handle certain people any more.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear my relationship with certain people falling apart.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear my relationship with most people falling apart.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear not being able to stand certain people, where, I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear not being able to stand people who I get along perfectly fine with for real.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear my relationship with other people tearing apart at the seems when in reality everything seems fine.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear that I'm mistaken and people who I seem to get along with I'm actually somehow in deep water with.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to justify these fears why fear I'm having a bad relationship with someone who i seem to get along with.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear something is going terribly wrong with these people I'm seeing where I can trace very well what might be happening why go into fear instead of dig in and question things instead of giving authority to fear.

When and as I see myself fearing these two particular people, I stop, I breathe, I realize that I can open up my suspension of these two people instead of fearing them where if I have a posyential reasonable awnser to why I'm afraid of my relationship with them not being very well as it seems to be I'd crather pursue the point within me that I'm suspecting I'd the cause then just sit here dwelling in fear, thus, I commit myself to when I see myself agarid if these two particular people as fearing my relationships with them not bekfnas sound as I think it is on the surface to pursue my suspensions and to dig in, where I'm pursing the point within me, seeing it has nothing to do with them and everything to do with my own secret vrealtuosn I have with these people that they aren't aware of.

If I have a secret realitionship with someone in not revealing to them when I interact with them in person why am I suprised that it can suddenly fall apart, it's call one sided and made up, why would it hold? Why should it hold?

I commit myself to apply this logic to all relationships I have where I should always stop my secret relationship with others and get into the real meat of actually interacting with them.