Thursday, April 27, 2017
Day 340- my sound signature
Desteni.org
I struggle with words. I speak my mind because I have no real word I live by.
My mind speaks more then I do, I never found my word, never aligned myself with my word.
I don't know my word, I don't know what I've said or am saying.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel ashamed of how I've not found my word.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear not knowing what my word is.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear not knowing if my word is worth anything or not.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear my word getting bogged down with my thoughts and backchats.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear not knowing how to use my word.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear my word when I like to be alone with my word.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear having to perfect my word.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to desire to let my word do whatever I feel like wording.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hate having to perfect my tounge.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that my words are perfect when that's just an idea that I can see is wrong.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hate not knowing what to do with my word.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to let myself go crazy letting my mind spin out of control in my head then letting this form my word.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to separate myself from my word not seeing how core and crucial a part of me it is.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have no clue where I'm taking my word because I have had no idea that I'm living my word.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not take my own word seriously.
I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see my word has been slipping away my entire life since I can remember.
I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to trust myself to make my word grand and worth something.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not trust myself to be inspiring with my word.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear having to decide for myself what my word is and how I use it.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hate myself for speaking out of fear.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that my word is my sound.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear changing my sound.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hate how bogged down I've let my sound become that I can't speak clearly.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to let my sound be corrupted by my own thoughts and mental bubble.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear my sound signature being too deep for me to manage.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hate myself for losing control over my sound.
When and as I see myself beating myself up for not directing my sound in total perfection and dignity, I stop, I breathe, I realize that my sound is a part of who I am, thus, I commit myself to trust myself as the only one responsible and capable of managing my specefic creation as my sound signature.
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