Day 359- Humility

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel shocked by how much I've thought I've known about anything.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel suprised that I don't appear to know or comprehend anything in particular.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge myself as incompetent where 'I should know or be aware of something of significance by now'

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge myself for where I'm at where I don't need to know or understand more then where I am here and what I comprehend from where I am right now.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to convince myself that I know anything or understand anything.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge myself for being at the bottom where 'I should have become or accomplished more by now'

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not appreciate and relish where I am.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe I need to prove to anyone that I'm at within myself and my comprehension more then where I really am and what I comprehend.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that learning from others is a postion of inferioirty.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not embrace humility in always learning from others no matter where I am at within myself and my comprehnsion.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not appreciate and nurture the part of me that does want to learn from everyone as equal.

I commit myself to accept where I am and what I comprehened unconditionally.

I commit myself to not try to sell myself as understanding more or being more then who I am here.

Day 358- Believing self forgiveness is 'too difficult'

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to regret giving up on self forgiveness a long time ago when it seemed too difficult.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to regret seeing in retrospect that I could have stood and changed the course of my life in taking on the challange despite how big and daughnting it seemed.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to continue to feed into the same patterns of simply accepting where I am in relationsihp to self forgiveness because I now see no other choice for the rest of my life but accepting where I am as not challanging myself to take things even further and become more precise and specefic and following through to actually changing and living within my statements.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to regret pushing myself to become the best I can be in relationship to my writing and living of self forgiveness now because I've faced the consqeunces of making a run for it, when I would have liked to have stood and faced up to the challange the moment it arouse instead of coming back to it defeated years later only because there's no choice left.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to dismiss everything I've learnt and grown and perfected along the way to this point seeing everything as pointless and worthelss without a fundamental grip undersatnding and application of self forgiveness.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to go into a mood energetic state of being defeated as not really caring, and just doing it because I have to not beacuse I really see myself as capable and willing to go all the way for whatever it takes of me to do so.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel sad that I've lost and diminished all my drive and inspiration and passion towards process and self forgiveness and am just pushing myself day by day from a point of this is just my life now, this is just what I do, as if who I am within in it doesn't matter anymore.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not be patient with myself and nurture myself in appreciating that I'm here, I am the decesions and consqueences I've made up to this point, and that's ok, because I am here again.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to supress and go numb within myself to not have to face every day all that I've lost in what I've chosen in trying to cheat and manuver my way out of simply sitting down and accepting what I must do and putting everything I have into it for the rest of my life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to go into depression not seeing anything I could do as worth it due to having fallen in relationship to what could have been for myself if I had not faultered and ran where I was supposed to stand.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to see no reason to not just keep digging myself deeper becoming moody and spiteful seeing myself as inivitably having to stand and fight to stand over and over again for the rest of my life to no end.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to react and go into a mood in relationship to the consquences and points where I've fallen up to this point where I'm within this just feeding into the same pattern all over again and reinforcing it under the guise of trying again, without really changing who I am within it all.

When and as I see myself reacting to the challange of what I must do in relationship to perfecting myself within self forgiveness, I stop, I breathe, I realize that going into a mood over how I've complicated my application and diminished myself is me falling within the same point all over again, and not even willing to accept standing in just the most small simple minute starting point, thus, I commit myself to write myself self forgiveness or speak my self forgiveness consistnetly and regularly every day or where I can every other day as the smallest act of standing in relationship to where I've fallen in giving up to extreme lengths in the past in relationship to self forgiveness.

Day 357- Self conscience paranoia

Desteni.org

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear others being able to see into me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear others being able to see my consquences.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel uncomfortable suspecting everyone to be able to see into me to one degree or another and being able to see where I'll stand or fall or anything about me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear others picking on me where they can see my vulnrabilities when in reality no one points anything out to me and let's me handle things on my own unless there's something very serious needing serious adressal to support me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hate the support system of other people being able to see me as themselves and being able to refrence me with themselves and point out diffrences in me with them to support me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel inferior to others who I suspect being able to see things in me that I want to hide and keep away from anyone else seeing.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to blow my issues and problems out of proportion by hiding and supressing them to protect me from others isntead of simply adressing what are actually simple points that would be better forgiven then supressed and hidden.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hide away from other people instead of utilizing them as a mirrior into myself where each person is someone I can look into myself at from a diffrent point of view.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to compare myself to others instead of using them to look at myself from a diffrent persepctive as who am I as an old person, who am I as a women, who am i in relationship to an animal.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to go into opinion of I don't like that person, isntead of seeing it as I don't like who I am as that person, I don't like who I am in relationship to that person.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to go into fear of they can see the truth of me, insetad of I can see the truth of me through them as a mirrior.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hate having to question who I am accepting and allowing of myself through others.

I commit myself to stop fearing others being able to see into me.

I commit myself to breathe and shift into I see me through others.

Day 356- Channeled message from the owl

Desteni.org

https://eqafe.com/p/channeled-message-from-the-owl-part-1

The owl in the interview said that human beings are creating consequences for nature. So then I write out my reaction to this as my starting point to create clarity without reaction so I can see how to move forward in my life after finding out what's happening on earth because of humans as myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear my responsability to correct myself as a human being.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear questioing what choice I have then to become the best I can through process after seeing what's happening with nature beyond what I can see for myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel guilty for thinking that nature will just have to deal with human consquences and it's not my problem.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel guilty for not bettering myself for life and nature more effectively and consistently with the tools I've had.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to justify me not using the tools I have as effectively as possible to change myself in relationship to life and nature.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel guilty being alive knowing that I cannot immidetely correct myself and will inevitably continue to contribute to abuse while working towards change in my self thorugh my tools.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hide from the serious nature of consquences I see in watching the interview with owl by supressing myself into complacity and giving up.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that what's happening on earth doesn't concern me if I'm not aware of it.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear being responsible for the issues and problems with my own libing and behaviours I've created over time.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to further compromise myself by going into panic racing thoughts of 'I need to change right now to fix things on my end'

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not be practical as seeing the infromation as supporting my comprehension of why I need to walk process and at what pace is needed and appropriate to push myself as hard as possible without overwhelming myself to a point of self defeatism.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge myself as a human being as bad for not exsisting and living in way that supports what's best for life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel overwhelmed that my goal for my process shouldn't be to just take care of myself before I die but also do better for nature and others.

When and as I see myself feeling guilty for my contribution to the massive abuse occuring on earth as myself as a human, I stop, I breathe, I realize that the guilt is a distraction causing even futher abuse and no ansers, thus, I commit myself to breathe and to focus on pushing my writing and application in process further to actually figure out what I'm going to do and how I'm going to write out and change for myself instead of going into guilt and self defeatism without adressing the actual infromation presented by the owl in the interview.

Day 355- Stomache

Desteni.org

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hate seeing the physical consquences of my actions within my own body.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel annoyed with physical discomfort in my body instead of appreciating it and looking into everything it represents.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to blame my stomache saying 'why don't you get your act together you're the only thing holding me back from being physically very pleased and comfortable to just exsist'

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel ashamed of what I feel moving in my stomache as discomfort.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to desire to be better then discomfort inside of my own stomache.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to try to force myself to work past my stomache issues instead of simply working with them and achnoleging that I have something coming up in my stomache that clearly needs to be adressed.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to try to override what my stomache is trying to show me by working out to try to trim the fat off my stomache so that I can just dismiss whatever I'm feeling in my stomache as if losing weight is something I can just immidetely do without still being stuck with the feeling for as long as it takes to lose weight assuming that losing weight would even be a solution.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feeling high strung trying to override what my stomache is showing me instead of working with it in a way I can operate more smoothly internally.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define slowing down to adress my body as my stomache as dimnishing to my process as if my process has nothing to do with how I physically feel at all.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel helpless within the deliberate action of breathing and slowing down to be able to open up and adress what's in my stomache.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear what's in my stomache bringing up things in me that will make it clear that I need to change in certain ways.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not accept responsability for the creation process occuring within and as whatever is moving inside of my stomache which is cleary energetic of something I've done and created over time as myself as energetic mind stuff.

When and as I see myself refusing to slow down and adress what is rising up within and as me as my stomache, I stop, I breathe, I realize that in trying to overpower my own stomache and dismiss what my stomache is brining up I am creating the opposite of what I mean to create in overriding my stomache and will be forced to adress what I need to adress which my stomache was showing me one way or another, thus, I commit myself to breathe and to slow down to bring awareness to my stomache when I see something out of alignment moviign as energy moving within my stomache.

Day 354- New Problems

Desteni.org

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge my life as better now because I have 'better' problems then in the past.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge my new issues in life as easier to adress then my past issues in life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge myself as being in a better position to deal with my problems I have now then how I was with my problems in the past.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge my life as better now because I expereince less intense problems in life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to build myself up to be doing so great and able to handle so much more without actually looking into how I handle things now.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge myself as not having changed at all and simply not having the same problems I had externally from the past.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear simply supressing the impact of my old problems and replacing them with new problems which I'm equally numb and desensatised to.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear simply being desensatied to things more and simply not caring or willing to adress things as much.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge myself as not deserving to have fewer issues in my life then in the past.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge myself as not having worked and applied myself hard eough to have been able to move past my old problems and have new problems which aren't as intense.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear old problems in myself reappearing and having to start all over from scratch in relationship to them if they do come back up in a more or equal powerful intensity as in the past.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear simply tricking myself to believing that I have everything under control in my life now.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to desire to race forward and gain more stability and footing in my life so I can squash out my older issues which have brought me the most suffering all at once to no longer have to deal with or assossiate with them.

When and as I see myself judging myself or talking myself up as being so much better then any other time in my life, I stop, I breathe, I realize it's not a matter of convincing myself that all is well and down hill from here but simply living and applying in each breathe taht which has supposebly brought me to the position I seem to see myself in, thus, I commit myself to keep applying myself as I am as how I've gotten to a position where I can do more with less consquences to my wellness and health.