Day 409 - Directing myself as equal to time.

 I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to abuse time.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create time as a point of which I use to abuse myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to abuse myself by believing I am wasting my time on earth. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel guilty for wasting the real time breath by breath which I have to change myself and share that impact outside of myself as equal to myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to compare how I have spent my time with how others have spent their time. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to attempt to race through time instead of walking surely and slowly in each breath. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use time to create separation.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not use time as a tool.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge myself for wasting time and spending moments that I cannot get back in ways of which I regret and saw only my self interest in those moments of time causing me to not move in time and be stuck in time. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to react to the statement that I am running out of time.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to attempt to conquer time and so abuse my breath by breath real time living in the process. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to abuse myself when I say I am going to do something for the last time and then continue doing it despite committing myself to stop the action of abusing or wasting my time. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself by the time I have or do not have.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear myself as time as only having a set amount of time to have the maximum amount of usage of my time and then upon death having completely run out of time with no clear degree or definition of if any impact I can have on earth after death. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear my time is running out very soon.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to suppress and not share so others can see that their time is also about to be up very soon. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use time to compete with others to have more experience and more value from my time to elevate my time at the diminishment of others time. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to waste others time. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fuck myself with time.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to let my mind take over and become more and more abusive as I allow separation in my mind to run rampant in time. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create time frames which mean nothing and give them value and say this is how long I am going to isolate and abuse myself for giving power to time as if time is the one dictating the choice for me as if time is it's own entity. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to make time my god. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not become a time god myself as a god of words breath by breath speaking words in real time as a god and master of time and words. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not use time to give as I'd like to receive. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to attempt to race through time and get to the point where I escape from time at death where then I no longer have the ability to create time as mind time.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to sit in the classroom when I was in school watching the clock tick becoming anxious and anticipating when I'd be released from the classroom to leave the box and go into another box where I wait and watch as time slips by. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to let time control everything in my exsistence. 

When and as I see myself going into separation as time, becoming anxious about the time, waiting for the time, fearing the time, trying to squeeze in and stretch the time, I stop, I breathe, I realize that time does not exist, but that I have created myself in and as time in separation from who I am as timeless, thus, I commit myself to focus my purpose by living to optimize myself to utilize every second of time as a piece of reference of the rotations of the earth going around the sun and the small fragments used to represent seconds which can be counted multiple in each breath. 

I commit myself to stop abusing myself with time by fearing it and going into separation from it.

I commit myself to direct time as equal as who I am as a tool of measurement to measure who I was in each moment of each breath while the sun was rotated by the moon and earth as the ultimate measure of time and seasons and motion on earth.