Day 386- lowest point

 I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear I am doing more damage to myself than I am healing myself of my trauma.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to put additional burden on myself judging myself as an elite who deserves punishment.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that just because someone is not in my immidete environment that I am not a part and influence of their lives as an equal.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fail to direct every environment I encounter as equal to myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself myself keep inventing lowest points for myself because I'm not directing the points within myself that have already built up to devastating consequences.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to blame myself for other people's suffering instead of taking responsibility for myself and my partner in our immidete environment.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear reaching such a low point that I am simply disregarded as being worthy of life by existence itself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hate walking through my lowest points u continue to create without giving myself a step by step breath by breath solution to be lived and applied whoever I go.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to refuse to accept when rock bottom is simply the lowest point I'm ever willing to go again.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear not being able to decide for myself what the next best step for me is.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not honor myself enough to accept today as a fresh start and not a consequence of my past transgressions.

I commit myself to start today as a new day and a new chance to do my best.