Thursday, April 7, 2016
Day 77- Friends
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to desire to have friends.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to do whatever is required to impress my friends.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to judge myself as stupid for doing things that will impress my friends.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to be embarrassed by the lengths I will go to, to have friends.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to try to do the things that I think will impress other people.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to become emotionally attached to people.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to automatically want to go back to the good feeling of friendship after facing the emotional fallout of losing a friend.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not know for myself how to spend my time with people in my world because I only consider the good and bad polarity of friendship.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not consider the best way to spend my time with and in relationship to other people, because I only see the desire of feeling good in relationship to other people.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to regret saying things out of spite towards my friends.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to regret saying things out of spite because I risk losing my friends and the good feelings I have in relationship towards them.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel guilty about affecting my relationship towards others with the words I speak to them or to others, because I feel bad about risking losing my good feeling relationship.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to judge myself as being a bad person for talking about my friends out of spite, instead of seeing what is actually occurring as trying to control my relationship with my friends the way I would like them to be.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to try to influence my friends with my words.
I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to realize the opposite of a friend is an enemy.
I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to realize when I am living the word friend I am also living the word enemy.
I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to realize when I live the words being a very good friend, I live the potential to also be a very bad friend.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear my friends being mad at me for causing problems for them.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear causing problems for my friends because I don't want to disappoint them.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to set the standard for myself as being an impressive and valuable friend.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to judge myself out of spite when I feel I have not reached that standard.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to view people as either friends or not friends, and within this limit my vocabulary and potential for interaction.
I commit myself to stop, breathe, when and as I see myself creating internal conflict in relationship to my friends, as I realize there existing more than friend and non friends in my relationship and understanding of others.
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