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I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to suppress my stress where I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be surprised when I'm super stressed out at work where, I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be surprised that I have so much built up in relationship to work in reaction and stress where, I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself as stupid for forgetting how hard work is on me and just suppressing it through games and videos and it's like I live a double life where I get home and forget about all the stress but never deal with it for the next day.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to always believe that the next day will be better where I have no evidence to back it up and haven't actually put the work into making it a better less stressed day.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear where does the stress go?
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear how much stress I have built up that I feel I must hide from it that I cannot face it all.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself as needing to face my stress all at once where I don't need to face it all at once just accept it and not suppress it and forget about it and wait for it to sneak back in.
When and as I see myself thinking that I'm done with this shift, the stress is over now, I stop, I breathe, I realize I'm lying to myself for some reason because the stress doesn't just go away on it's own, thus, I commit myself to look when I'm not in work, where is the stress at within me, where am I carrying it, where I know it will be back during the next day we work so I won't have to be surprised and caught of guard but see instead where I'm suppression it that I keep forgetting it.
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