Day 139- Obsessed

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fight within myself when I obsess over something in my mind.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to let my obsessive mind get out of hand by fighting it, and thus giving it the opprituinuty to retreat and return stronger.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to look for and pin point things to obsess over.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not release things from within me in a practical manner, allowing points to build up until the only way to release is difficult.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realize the option of release within myself.

What point am I trying to reach within my Obsession's?

Practical living in each breathe, to direct my mind appropriately and to act on principle.

A demonic obsession.

I can see my demon.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to become obsessed over irrelevant occurrences.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to be obsessed over status and stature.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to be obsessed over who I am.

An obsession is worse than a possession, because there's the inherit choice involved in obsession, there's a clear choice, and when that choice becomes thinned, and the choice is lost, reaction and possession occur.

For me I can see how I could have let things go, but choose to hold on, until I didn't have a choice any more, but I can give myself back my choice.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to create possessions within myself where I saw myself over thinking and overworking myself in relationship to a point within myself and made the decision to hold on, even though I knew it wasn't best for me.

How has obsession always been a part of my nature, and how has holding on as obsessing led me to very specific occurrences in my life.

Which then I define myself by said occurrences and become further entrenched in the idea of who I am.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to be obsessed within fear.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to be obsessed with doing something good with my life.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not trust myself to accomplish something unless I obsess over it until I'm forced to comply.

The songs that get stuck in my head, relationships to people always under analization, memories replaying in my head.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to obsess over my relationships to other people.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to obsess over my relationship to songs which then cannot be released and play in my head.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to obsess over the past as memories, not allowing myself to be released, not allowing myself to let go, what forces me to be obsessed?

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to force myself to be obsessed, because I will not bend for any other way but my own.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to be defined by my own way of existence without question.

There always has been the question, what else is there?

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to obsess over my own form of abuse as my personal enslavement, when I could have just questioned what else is there for me?

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to obsess over my own way, so I don't have to face anything outside of myself in self honesty, so that nothing else matters.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to obsess only on what matters to me.

Obscene, obscure. O be seen. Ohh you'll see, when I get my way, you'll see me.

Obituary.

Oblong.

Oblique.

Obliged.

Obligatory.

Oblivion.

Obey.

I commit myself to stop, breathe, when and as I see myself becoming possessed, within obsession, as I realize the opportunity I have to be directive in the face of obsession, and I direct myself to in these moments take a stance within myself to not participate with my Obsession's, as allowing my Obsession's to come in to my mind, and them to be released without resistance.