I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to create so much in my mind.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to create so much experience within myself that I cannot keep track of.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to create and structure so many thoughts and visions and experiences that I cannot manage it all.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to both create more than I can carry and not carry what I have created.
So I have too much in my head, but it's too late now.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel like a victim to all the thoughts and patterns and experiences I have created in my life.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to react with frustration, because it's not 'fair'.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe it's not fair my mind overwhelms me with all these things, when it's in fact my own manifestation of myself.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not face that my mind is my own manifestation when I am frantic and upset, but then, I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to give extra attention and recognition to how great my mind is when I utilize it to have fun, and be creative and enjoy myself within my world.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to blame my mind when it's against me, but love it when I feel like I'm on top of everything and am ok.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to box myself into this prism of take and reject with my mind.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to create this personality of taking when it's good but rejecting when it's bad, without seeing how the two are interrelated.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to hustle within myself as my mind, where I want to have all the good and none of the bad, when the two are interconnected and will be balanced out.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to expect my mind to be able to give me what I want and not what I do not, without realizing myself as the source of my mind.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not see who I am as the manifestation of this reality, and in that not recognizing that when my mind is playing against me, it's me playing against myself.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to blame other's as being the source of my bad or negative experience within my mind, and within this, I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not take any part of my mind construct back to myself.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to blame my circumstances.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to blame my circumstances as the things that I may or may not have directed within my world and experience, instead of realizing there is no where to hide.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to hide away certain parts of my mind in other people, in god, in the spirit, in relationships.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realize, if I do not stand for what is best, bad cards will be dealt and good cards will be dealt.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to act on the belief that if my hand of cards is good, then I will be fine, but if not, then my mind and body will be in ruins.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not take all responsibility in making a good life for myself, while still realizing what goes wrong and what I cannot help, does not excuse me to give into my mind of self destruction.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to react when things become hectic and overwhelming out of blame of the situation.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not face my relationship within myself towards any given situation and within this not see myself as the one manifesting my experience, and defining who I am and how I will act in certain scenarios.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not accept my circumstances for good and for bad.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not be able to simply conceptualize for myself that, some things will be, maybe I had to do with it directly, maybe not, but regardless, it is for me to move myself in my world, and within my mind.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to over complicate the simple structure of self responsibility, as I realize self responsibility means doing my best to do best for myself as one and equal to other's in all ways mind and world.
When and as I see myself blaming my current circumstances for the state of my being within my mind and body, I stop, breathe, and direct myself within the realization that I am the creator of my own reality within my mind, and must face what comes in my life with strides, and what I cannot help, I cannot, but I must act for real, to reassert a better world for myself and other's, because just stopping my relationship is not enough, without reasserting myself in all ways.
For me, I think this is what it's all about.
Example:
I'm mad at my brother, right.
So I created the being mad when he does this.
Because it makes me have to do more chores when he does not do his.
So I'm mad because I feel victimized for having to do more chores because of his actions.
Take all that back, and what's left, the chore must be done, or maybe a different approach is possible, I figure it out to the best of my abilities and optimization, and take action.
That's it, that's life, maybe the chore was growing the crops, and I live on a farm with just me and my brother, and if the crops aren't grown neither of us eat.
Take back the dirt and rot of being mad and blaming, clean the slate through self forgiveness, reassert what is best.
Then we get to eat, and probably be quite happy living together, and then we die, but what we lived, was lived, maybe we shared our life with other's and they learned from us in how to just act, just figure things out, maybe not.
Interesting.
Life is interconnected through oneness and equality.
If I live alone with no contact to anyone, but myself, maybe on another planet, and what I do will never directly affect anyone since I never contact or speak with anyone.
I still must take my world back to myself, because I on my planet, was all there ever was.
I must live as the best I can for and as myself, so I can have a good life, and if I was the only person to ever exist, than that's what life was.
I lived, so I did what was best for myself as life.
Maybe it's more than life, it's the physical, I did the best for myself, in relationship to what is here.
That stands for itself.
That's the physical.
A perfect system, based on mathematics.
That's who I am.
Now I just need to direct myself in the best way, in all ways, as I redefine my relationship to my mind, as my relationship to everything within myself, to be one and equal with what's here.
Why? Self responsibility is inevitable, and I do not want myself or anyone else to suffer the hard had of consequences.
Got it, simple enough, covers all the important bases,
problem is, I as what I have created, has ulterior objectives and agendas.
How did that happen?
It doesn't make sense.
Consciences is a weed killer.
I'm killing myself because I cannot stand for life.
What that comes down to is...
Something somewhere somehow down the line, for life to be, it had to be able to exist in it's current format on earth, and earth has earthquakes, tornado's, tsunamis, and sometimes if you live in the desert, or in Antarctica, you might not have food, so the mind is to survive on earth.
HEY EVERYONE, WE HAVE THE MEANS TO LIVE GOOD LIVES NOW, YOU CAN TURN YOUR MIND OFF, SELF FORGIVENESS, REASSERT SELF COMMITMENT TO LIFE. WE'RE HERE, WE CAN ALL HAVE ENOUGH.
Now we just have to survive ourselves... Interesting.
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